HOW TO GET OVER BEING CUT
When you are dropped from a sorority during sorority recruitment, it hurts. It is a similar feeling to being ghosted. You never know the reason why you were not invited back.
Everyone gets dropped by sororities. It is part of the process. If you are not invited back to the maximum number of sororities for a round or all of the sororities you tried to drop are back on your schedule, it is normal. Many potential new members never max out. Each sorority can only invite back a certain percentage of potential new members because of RFM.
You need to realize that being dropped does not mean the sorority did not like you. The sorority might have had to cut 70% of all potential new members, and you did not have the right score to be invited back. The members might see you as a better fit in another sorority.
When you are dropped, you have to bounce back fast. You have more sororities to meet. You need to have great conversations to be invited back. You need to walk into each sorority cool, calm, and collected. Here is a three-step process to stop the negative thoughts and move into the positive
STEP #1. Check in with yourself and be honest [how are you feeling?]
STEP #2. State the facts
STEP #3. Move into the positive
Example: Sam got dropped by a sorority she LOVED.
First, she checks in with her emotions. She says, “I am upset, frustrated, confused, hurt, angry, and nervous to be dropped by more sororities.”
Next, she states the facts on her schedule – “I am looking at my schedule. I got invited back to 5 sororities. I really like 4 out of the 5.”
Then, she redirects her thoughts – “Okay! That is great! I have four great options. I can only accept one bid. What do I need to do to keep these sororities? I need to keep expanding on my answers with specific details and memories. I need to talk to the members like they are my best friends. I need to let them know I am excited to be back and let my personality shine! I can do this!”
Understand your options
As I talk to more and more potential new members each year, I find many of them make rash decisions during their experience. For example, a woman is dropped from a very competitive sorority and has a great overall schedule. Since she was dropped from the one sorority she loved, she is considering dropping out of sorority recruitment, participating in COB, or using a Single Intentional Preference Vote [also known as a suicide vote].
As you experience these thoughts, you need to think of the bigger picture and ask yourself:
Why did I decide to participate in sorority recruitment?
What am I looking for in a sorority?
How hard is it to get a bid as a sophomore at my college?
Is that sorority going to participate in COB?
What are my odds of getting a COB?
Will a Single Intentional Preference Vote give me a disadvantage?
Am I ONLY obsessed with being in a “top” sorority?
COB [Continuous Open Bidding]
How does COB work
This process starts 72 hours after formal sorority recruitment. If sororities do not reach quota and, or are under chapter total, they can extend bids to potential new members who either:
Dropped out of recruitment
Got dropped from recruitment
Did not go through sorority recruitment
It is important to note that not all sororities participate in COB. Do not bet on this option to join a particular sorority.
What is a quota?
Panhellenic requires each sorority to extend a certain number of bids to potential new members. This number is the quota.
The quota is determined by the number of potential new members who sign the MRABA and voted after Pref divided by the number of sororities on campus. For example, if 1,000 potential new members sign the MRABA and there are 10 sororities on campus. Each sorority has to take a minimum of 100 new members.
What is the chapter total?
Every sorority on campus has to maintain a certain number of members. If they fall below this number, they have the opportunity to give bids out to women.
A sorority can meet the quota but still be under the chapter total.
How does COB work?
Usually, there is an interest form you need to fill out. If your college does not have an interest form for COB, email your Greek Life Office.
Once the sorority decides to go through COB, the recruitment team looks at the interest form and the names that the Greek Life Office gave them. If a sorority thinks you are a good candidate, they invite you to an event.
After the event, if the sorority thinks you are a good fit, the sorority will give you a bid. You decide if you want to accept the bid or not. Usually, you have 24 hours to accept your bid.
Is it hard to get a COB bid?
It depends on your college. Typically, it is more difficult than formal sorority recruitment.
Let’s look at two examples.
University of Alabama
Typically, around 90% of all potential new members accept a bid at the University of Alabama. If 2,500 women participate in sorority recruitment, that means 250 women would have dropped out. Many of the sororities participating in COB can give out an additional 5 to 7 bids. If half of the sororities participate [8], that means [potentially] a maximum of 56 bids would be given out — 22% of the women who dropped would receive a bid.
Indiana University
In 2022, 69% of all potential new members accept a bid at the Indiana University. 552 women did not receive a bid. Again, many of the sororities participating in COB can give out an additional 5 to 7 bids. If half of the sororities participate [11], that means [potentially] a maximum of 77 bids would be given out — 14% of the women who dropped would receive a bid.
How hard is it to get a bid as a sophomore at my college?
Should you go through sorority recruitment for a second time?
It depends on your college. If your college, does not have a secondary quota or an upperclassmen quota, it will be much more difficult to receive a bid. Many of the sororities will not extend bids to sophomores or upperclassmen.
How to see if your college has a secondary or upperclassmen quota
You want to email Panhellenic at your college and ask. To find the email for Panhellenic, Google “college name Panhellenic sorority recruitment.” Once you are on the website, search at the bottom of the homepage or in the contact section.
Colleges that do not have a secondary or upperclassmen quota [It will be very difficult to receive a bid as a sophomore, and you will have limited options]
Auburn
Indiana University
LSU
University of Miami [FL]
Indiana University
Oklahoma State University
Ole Miss
University of Arkansas
University of Virginia
Vanderbilt
Should you use a Single Intentional Preference Vote?
Single. Intentional. Preference. Vote. Also, known as a suicide vote or SIP.
Will you be placed at the end of the bid day list? Short answer no.
Will you be automatically cut? Short answer no.
Will you have a disadvantage if you use this type of voting style? Short answer yes
To learn more about a SIP, click here.
Good luck with sorority recruitment! I am rooting for you!
Sloan
You have a math test in two weeks that is worth 90% of your grade for the class. You want to get an A. You are looking for guidance on how to get your A.
First, you ask a friend, not in your math class, “How do I get an A+ on my test?” She says, “You need to study.” This answer leaves you frustrated.
Then, you ask your teacher, “How do I get an A+ on my test?” She gives you a step-by-step plan.
Who was more helpful?
Your teacher, right?
To get an A, you need to know the right information and have a step-by-step plan.
To get a bid to a sorority you love, you have to communicate you are the right fit for the sorority before and during sorority recruitment. A step-by-step plan tells you how and when to communicate.
BUT… why do so many women going through sorority recruitment ONLY use the advice they find on Youtube and TikTok? Does it help them stand out and get a bid?
Click the video below to see how The Ultimate Guide to Sorority Recruitment can help you create and implement your plan.