Going to college out-of-state has different challenges than going to college in-state. The same goes for sorority recruitment.
Is it harder?
Yes and no. It really depends on how you look at it. I go deeper into this topic later in the post.
I went to the University of Georgia and was an in-state student. My younger sister decided to not attend a college in Georgia and went rogue and applied to Arizona State University two days before the application closed…. Crazy, right? She is the spontaneous one in the family.
Long story short, she got a scholarship to ASU and decided to go there. She packed up all her things and headed out to Arizona. She was excited to start a new chapter of her life and meet new people. She knew she wanted a sorority to be a part of this new chapter.
That summer, she asked me for some advice. I told her all about sorority recruitment. However, we both knew her sorority recruitment experience would be different.
These are the two main differences:
She was at a different college -- every college has a different structure for sorority recruitment
She was on the other side of the country -- Yes, there is a huge difference in sorority recruitment out West and in the South.
Throughout sorority recruitment, she faced different challenges than me and some similar challenges. She ended up joining Chi Omega. Since joining, she has met some lifelong friends and is living her best life.
Today, I sat down with Brooke, my sister, and we talked all about her experience. I am sharing all the details from our conversation here for you.
I hope this helps!
How was your sorority recruitment process different from an in-state potential new member?
Well, only one girl from our high school when to ASU. However, she dropped out of her sorority after her second year. I asked her about sorority recruitment, but she did not tell me much. I got some advice from you and our cousin. Both of you went to SEC colleges. I did not really know what to expect. I feel like in-state potential new members kind of know what to expect because they can talk to members from high school, someone's older sister, or a friend of a friend.
Did you feel like you had a disadvantage?
Yeah kinda. If you know members in other sororities at your college, you definitely have an advantage. The members in the sororities are able to put in the good word for you.
Read all about why you need to reach out HERE.
But, that is only if you are friends with them, right? What if they dislike you?
Just an FYI: If a sorority member does not like you (for whatever reason), they might write a negative recommendation letter or RIF letter.
You are right. On the other hand, I had no reputation going into sorority recruitment, so no one disliked me for any situation. I felt like most of the sororities gave me an equal chance. As I went through sorority recruitment, I found out some sororities only gave bids to women from Arizona and California.
were your conversations only oriented on being out-of-state?
Yes, a lot of them! The first couple of rounds every sorority asks the same questions like, “Why did I choose to go to ASU?” After a couple of sororities, my answer started to come off robotic. I almost just wanted to walk into the room and be like “Hey! My name is Brooke. I am from Georgia. I am going to ASU because of my major.”
I wish I had talked more about the topics that were interesting to me.
Like what topics?
More about the sororities. I really did not know much, so I wanted to see what they were all about.
What are some tips for out-of-state girls going through sorority recruitment?
Do not get discouraged throughout the process. It takes time to find your #1 sorority. You will find your people.
If you start to feel robotic, take hold of the conversation. Talk about the things you want to know. Ask a question.
Be careful with talking about your experience with the other potential new members. Since I did not know much about each sorority, I heard a lot of rumors about each sorority. I felt like it started to influence my decisions.
Do not be so serious. Have fun!
What did you do to have fun?
I had fun conversations with the sorority members. At first, I was so formal and felt like I need to be perfect. When someone would ask me why I decided to go to ASU, I said “They have a great speech therapy program….." Then, I realized that is not me. I am not super serious, so I started to tell them the real reason.
What was the reason?
I grew up in the South, and I wanted to get out…. lol. Really, I just wanted to change. I also shared funny stories about high school and my peers. The members loved hearing my stories.
Did you only speak to other out-of-state members?
I spoke to members from all over. Some of the members were from Arizona, some from Southern California, and some from Georgia. I did not care what state they were from. I cared more about connections.
However there was this one member from Georgia, we just got each other. We related on so many different topics. It just made me feel a little bit more at home.
Did you join that sorority?
No. I liked the sorority, but I found my home somewhere else.
How was your transition?
It was actually really easy. I am an outgoing person, and I was close with my roommate. She was from the Chicago area, so we were in similar situations (both out-of-state). We vented to each other all about sorority recruitment and everything else.
What were you looking for in a sorority? Was it different than the other potential new members?
I was looking for friends. I had a close group of friends in high school, and I wanted to find some great friends in college too. I think most potential new members go into sorority recruitment trying to find friends. College can be hard. You are thrown into different situations, and you really need friends to help you out!
How did you use being out-of-state as an advantage (standing out)?
I pulled out all my crazy stories. I told people about some of the kids from high school. They would laugh at my stories. I knew the sorority members would remember me because I was different.
Did you feel the pressure to join one sorority because it was the sorority everyone was talking about?
Not necessarily to join. I did want them to like me though.
I totally get it. I feel like every potential new member is in that same position.
How about as the rounds went on? Did you feel the same way?
No. I did not care. I made my own opinions and formed connections with girls in the sororities.
what makes GOING THROUGH SORORITY RECRUITMENT out-of-state different THAN in-state?
You are not as comfortable.
When is sorority recruitment comfortable? You never know what is going to happen.
Yeah, I guess your right!
Also, some girls get a huge cut after the first round [invited back to very few sororities]. It is really hard on them. However, you cannot give up. You have to be confident in who you are, and you have to form connections with the girls in the sororities.
Did you find some sororities only took girls they knew? like girls from high school?
Yes and no. It really depends on the sorority.
I am sure a lot of the girls going through recruitment join the same sorority as their friends and older sisters.
Most of the sororities as ASU have members from all over.
Do you think going through recruitment out-of-state is more challenging?
Let’s be honest, it is hard for every potential new member (pnm). Literally, every pnm has her ups and downs throughout recruitment.
Make sure to let your personality shine. Do not try to fit an image.
Remember. The sororities are looking for new members that will add something to the sorority.
If you could do it over again, would you go through recruitment at your college?
OMG, yes! I made some amazing friends and met some great people!
DO YOUTUBE AND TIKTOK HELP YOU STAND OUT OR GAIN RUSH CRUSH STATUS DURING SORORITY RECRUITMENT?
When you depend on Youtube and TikTok for advice, you prepare like everyone else. When you look like everyone else, you do not stand out. If a sorority can only invite back 30% of all PNMs, how will you show them that you deserve to be in the top 30%?
Instead of using advice and being the Overlooked Potential New Member, you want to use a step-by-step plan to gain Rush Crush status -- stand out, have options, and run home to a sorority you love. Click the video below to see how CRUSH [sorority recruitment coaching] can help you create and implement your plan.
You have a math test in two weeks that is worth 90% of your grade for the class. You want to get an A. You are looking for guidance on how to get your A.
First, you ask a friend, not in your math class, “How do I get an A+ on my test?” She says, “You need to study.” This answer leaves you frustrated.
Then, you ask your teacher, “How do I get an A+ on my test?” She gives you a step-by-step plan.
Who was more helpful?
Your teacher, right?
To get an A, you need to know the right information and have a step-by-step plan.
To get a bid to a sorority you love, you have to communicate you are the right fit for the sorority before and during sorority recruitment. A step-by-step plan tells you how and when to communicate.
BUT… why do so many women going through sorority recruitment ONLY use the advice they find on Youtube and TikTok? Does it help them stand out and get a bid?
Click the video below to see how The Ultimate Guide to Sorority Recruitment can help you create and implement your plan.
$34.99
https://www.amazon.com/Ultimate-Guide-Sorority-Recruitment-sorority/dp/1674072309
$14.99
https://www.gettingthebid.com/store
